Struggle is Real!

1/12

I struggle whether I should write this down but it would be unreal if I only record the good but not the bad coz life is not rosy all the time.  

I am always cautious with friends, so when I felt that they are mine, I extended my love whole heartedly.  But often times in reality, this is just my thinking -- and it broke my heart not once but many, many times.  I hid my emotions pretty well and pretended that I don't care, but deep down inside, I do!!  MG is one the few that I am struggling with right now.  We used to hang out when she is in town, but her door is closed since last May when she was upset with my "unwelcomed" advice -- the time she found out her son wanted to move in with his dad.  I thought she needs time for herself and didn't want to open up so I gave her space and left her alone.  It used to be that she would tell me that she wouldn't trust the sisters in the ward, but now I found out that she would go and talk to others but me.  I am glad that she found people to talk to, but the ones who she talked would feed on her story.  I texted her on and off since she came back and tried to arrange for a get together and she would decline my offer.  She didn't mention a word about her mom and son but I knew what's going on with her life as a presidency.  She looked uncomfortable and made a comment that news spread out so quickly when we visited her mom at the hospital.

My heart ached to see our friendship fell apart, and for what she is going through.   I am tired to be a strong person.  I am tired of giving and asking for a relationship that is not base on mutual acceptance.  I fail badly this time!  

Grateful for the power of prayer -- for all that I could think of is to pray for her and her family.